So, I am going to let you all in on a little secret. I wasn't planning on sharing it until I got home, but I must share all that has happened and how it has strengthened my testimony. I truly know that God lives, He loves us, and He knows how to help us to do His will in this life. All that we must do is search for His help and He will always ALWAYS help us.
To start out, 4 weeks ago, I got a call from the mission assistants. The group of missionaries with whom I was going to finish the mission was very big, so much so that my mission President gave us all the decision to return in the beginning of February (aka TODAY) or at the end as planned. When I got the call, I felt a little shocked, and the elder I was speaking with told me to ponder and pray over it, and to call him two days later with the answer. I know that the answer perhaps seems obvious...STAY! But I found myself thinking "well, maybe I am receiving this option for a reason. Maybe there is something I need to do at home." I honestly didn't know, but I knew that the Lord knew. So I began praying...and fasting...and reading in the Book of Mormon. All of this teaching and testifying that I have been doing, and I got to put it into practice to make this big decision.
In the end, I got a resounding STAY. Alma 29:6. Alma 49:30. So I stayed. Continued working hard. And I quickly found that finishing the mission is tough. It is not just a waiting game of carefully measured patience. It is HARD. It is sadness in leaving my Chilean home, anxiety of trying to work hard right up until the end, striving to take advantage of every opportunity to share the gospel...even frustration at feeling that it is all just much too short. But I stayed strong, knowing that my Heavenly Father TOLD me that I am to stay. There were a few moments where I thought to myself..."Maybe it would have just been better if I had decided to leave early." It was hard, but with the help of my Savior, my Heavenly Father, my companion, and my Mission President, I just kept on chugging along. I kept on going.
And then today, I realized why I had to stay.
We had a special meeting to say goodbye to the 15 or so missionaries that decided to go home early. Because so many left, there were a few changes that had to be made with companionships and mission leadership. And I got called to be a Sister Training Leader, which is an assistant to the mission president, but the sister missionary version.
Talk about Hermana Harkins IN SHOCK! I only have three weeks left in the mission, and you are making me a sister training leader?! It came out of nowhere, and I am sure that my face showed every bit of my surprise. After the meeting, the sister that I am replacing came and talked to me, explained to me the sisters that I am over, which are the ones that need a little more help and attention, what it is that I have to do to go on divisions with them...My President came up and told me that we have a leadership meeting on Thursday...and I am still thinking to myself...WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
But I get it now :) God knew that this was going to happen, and He needed me to STAY. He needed me to stay in my sector, stay with my companion, and to help these sisters that I have the privilege to work with. God moves in mysterious ways, but all we have to do is TRUST Him and His mysterious ways. I know that if we search for His will, He will reveal it to us. Even if trials come, even if it gets tough, eventually we will ALWAYS be able to see exactly what it is that He has planned for us. I know that He lives and loves us. He has a plan for ME. And for YOU. And for US. So be bold, stay rad, do what you do, and let your light so shine!
Hermana Harkins
p.s. 22 days
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